Be Direct with your Children - The Eyes of Horus

Why should you be direct with your child?

Everything you do and know, you had to learn.  Whether it was to tie your shoelaces, ride a bike or even how you learn.  Children have the ability to absorb a lot of information and form cognitive behaviours and habits at an accelerated pace compared to adults, up until they are about 9 years old. As their brains are in the Alpha, Theta or Delta brain waves, it allows them to absorb what they are being taught without necessarily understanding what an adult may require.

This method of processing information works by the brain linking information together like a mind map, rather than in a logical sequence.  As a result, when the child is learning they may need guidance to be able to connect what they are learning with what they already know.

When a child is not given specific and direct information they will make sense of it based on what they already know.  If you ask them can they clean up their room, they will say “yes”. But what does yes mean?  It may mean that they are acknowledging that they are able to do this. They may mean that they will at some time in the future.  The yes may even just be an acknowledgement that they have heard you.  None of these responses are what you may have thought of. So, if you believe you understand that their yes means, that they will clean up their room, putting everything away within the next 5 minutes, you may be sadly mistaken.

What do you do instead?  You need to provide literal instruction to the child and help them to make sense of it in their mind as they build the links between what they know and what you are telling them. In this way, you will start to assist your child’s thinking to be able to understand and action what you mean.

If you are getting a child to do something or learn a topic, it is up to you to make sure they understand what you mean.  If you allow them to work it out for themselves, do not assume they will come up with the same answers and ideas as you.


Action for This Week

Next time you talk to your child, take notice how they respond.  Then check with them about what their understanding is and see if it is the same as yours.  The more you do this the better you get at relating to children so they can understand you, and you understand them.

Have a good week

David Donahoo

The Eyes of Horus

Transforming Your Dreams into Reality using your mind and spirit through Hypnotherapy, NLP, Life Transformation Coaching, Spiritual Coaching, EFT and Matrix reimprinting

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